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Shattered Illusions
Wednesday. 6.10.09 1:10 pm
I hate to shatter peoples' illusion but mine was sharply shattered and I made a much bigger commitment to get to this point. I won't flat out say anything bad amout people in the military, especially specific people, because that goes against our whole ethics and what not.

But think about it logically. Soldiers are humans. In theory better trained, more disciplined and loyal humans, but humans all the same. One standard of human beings is that we fuck up. All of us. So logically soldiers are bound to fuck up. My problem is the quality of the average human, which I think correlates to the same in the military. Sure I may be more cynical than most but I think for good reason. The average person will stab you in the back. Its expected. We're wired to survive, by whatever means. Nowadays its almost required to step on other people to ensure that survival. No matter how good a 'friend' you might think they are, ultimately it comes down to "you or me". SImple human nature, applies to all humans.

It sucks enough being anywhere, but its really unnerving here. And I dont want to focus on just the negative. As much (if not more) as people can amaze you by the scandalous shit they can do to their fellow soldier, they can do FOR their fellow soldier. If you don't buy it just read one Medal of Honor story. But its a simple fact: as amazing as these people were, there are their equivalent opposing force that are just terrible people. And again, I go back to the average person who is not at either extreme but I think closer to the more nefarious extreme than the admirable one. The people who can only derive respect by condescending soldiers because of their rank, not merit. The people who fuck up and stand there silent when everyone is punished for it. The people who remove your name from a product to send it up as their own. The people who hold a grudge at you for calling them a dick and a useless waste of a uniform for doing it. Its everywhere. Fuck theres enough people outside making life miserable that I shouldnt have to look over my shoulder for the people 'on my team'.

Before joining I saw people in uniform and thought they were like a higher class of humans. That was quickly taken away. The simple truth is we're another group of human beings with, in theory, and admirable goal. Alot of people join for very selfless reasons, and alot of people for selfish. I'm a mix of the two so im not trying to condemn anyone here, I just think people are loyal or admirable based on their nature, upbringing, experiences and you can't be taught it, likewise you can't just expect people to have these qualities because its expected of them. Sometimes a selfish person can have a selfless person do something amazing and change that selfish persons' whole perspective. I hate sounding so bitter and cold but I've found thats' how you have to be or else you'll get proper fucked.

I am afraid, that I do not know.
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» Ollie ( on 2010-09-01 02:56:09



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